I wanna bring you to show and tell
Very drunk. laura says hi. i can't find my pants. i think i'm in philly, but it might be jersey somewhere
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
