I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
Randomize
