just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
Apparently on the way out of the ER i asked the nurse to doggie-bag me some more morphine.
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize
