Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
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