R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
dear vagina, thank you for making it so goddamn hard to get pregnant. i love you.
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
Randomize