He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
Randomize
