would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
Randomize
