this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
My balls are so social today.
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
