The bird has been looking kind of ugly lately...gotta look nice to fly with the hawk ya know?
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
