Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
Randomize
