Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Randomize
