Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize
