I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
Sorry my hands just texted you
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
Def don't remember taking those pics I sent you...but it looks like I was in a car? Shit. Looks like my Uber passenger rating just went up exponentially.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
Randomize
