gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
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