Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
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