this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
Randomize
