I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
Randomize
