We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
Randomize