I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
Randomize