My balls are so social today.
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
Randomize
