You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
Randomize
