I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
she hid the dish soap because she was afraid someone would confuse it with the margaritas and drink it instead. her reasoning was "theyre both soo pink...i cant tell them apart"
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
Randomize
