Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
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