I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
Farmville is her only friend.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
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