I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize
