i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
You haven't lived until you've watched a retriever try to bring back the condom you just threw in its master's garbage
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
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