Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
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