I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
Randomize
