4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
I need to calm my uterus...
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
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