We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
In my junk email folder, there are literally 67 messages from Alcoholics Anonymous. What..the fuck.
when are you leaving homes?
it's 7:51. why the fuck are you awake at 7:51
I had a sex dream about Oprah.
go back to sleep
dude. it was a sex dream. about. Oprah.
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
Randomize
