I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
I woke up to him trying to put his dick in my mouth. When I asked him what he was doing he said he was trying to make me stop snoring...
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
Randomize
