He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
Randomize
