idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
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