The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
Fuck twitter. Fuck men. Fuck bras. Fuck flip flops. Fuck makeup. Fuck perfume.
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