she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
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