Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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