dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
Pregnant stripper...not hot.
lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
Randomize
