belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
Randomize
