I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
Randomize
