You're a womanizer and a bitch.
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
Randomize
