i just wanna soil my oats bro
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
Do you remember whose house we're in?
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
