a guy named alex was hitting on my friend tonight. he doesnt work on wind turbines tho.
Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
