So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
I just projectile vomited in a Methodist church parking lot. If Jesus didn't love me before he sure as hell doesn't now.
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
Randomize
