i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular
Wrong number and your a loser
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
Randomize
