you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
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