shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
He stopped his car in the middle of ongoing traffic to ask me to marry him. Then he got pulled over. Yeah I'd say the slutty Dallas Cowboys costume was a success.
Your hotness may or may not have landed him in jail.
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
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