It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
home. puking in laundry basket.
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
Randomize
