Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
