He asked to "fluff my boner.."
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
Randomize
