Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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