Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
I don't know, Alex. I don't know. I lost my keys, my debit card, my makeup bag, broke my purse, had to have someone cut my shoe off, I have no idea where my costume is. I woke up next to the biggest douchebag I know and made out with this other guy while SIMULTANEOUSLY talking on the phone to the guy I'm talking to...
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
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